Exploring Your Relationship with Your Body

Questions about what your body does, what you were told about it, and how you treat it now

Self-CareInfo SheetFree ResourceLast reviewed October 2026

Questions about what your body does, what you were told about it, and how you treat it now

Exploring Your Relationship with Your Body

Questions about what your body does, what you were told about it, and how you treat it now

Body image is how you see, think about, and feel about your body, and it shows up in how you treat your body day to day. Researchers who study positive body image describe it by what it includes: appreciating your body, accepting it, and seeing beauty in many kinds of bodies (Tylka & Wood-Barcalow, 2015).

These questions move from what your body does, to the messages you picked up about it, to how you care for it now. In one study, women with a negative body image who completed a set of structured writing exercises about what their bodies can do reported more body appreciation afterward than women in a comparison program (Alleva et al., 2015), so the first section starts there. Work through one section at a time, on paper or in conversation. There are no right answers.

What Your Body Does for You

List five things your body did for you this week that had nothing to do with how it looked. Carrying groceries counts. So does laughing until your stomach hurt.
Which of your senses do you enjoy most? Describe a recent moment when it gave you something good, like the smell of coffee, a song in the car, or a hot shower after a cold day.
Think of a time your body healed, adapted, or carried you through something hard. What did it do?
What would you like your body to still be able to do ten years from now? What helps with that today?

Messages You Absorbed

Family: What did the adults at home say about their own bodies? About yours? Think about comments at meals, in fitting rooms, or while looking at family photos.

Friends and school: Is there a nickname, a locker-room moment, or a weigh-in for a sport that stuck with you? How old were you?

Culture and community: What kind of body was admired where you grew up, in your culture, your faith community, or your neighborhood? How close did yours come to it?

Doctors and coaches: Has a health visit, trainer, or coach ever focused on your size in a way that stayed with you? What did you take from it?

Your own voice: Which of these messages do you now repeat to yourself, word for word? Whose voice does it sound like?

To sort each message by where it came from and whether it has helped or hurt, use Tracing the Messages That Shaped Your Body Image.

Comparison and Your Feeds

In one experiment, young women who spent 10 minutes on their own Facebook account ended up in a worse mood than women who browsed a neutral website. Women who often compared their looks with other people also reported bigger gaps between how their face, hair, and skin looked and how they wanted them to look, after Facebook more than after the neutral site (Fardouly et al., 2015).
Rate your mood from 0 to 10, scroll your most-used app for five minutes, then rate it again. What changed?
Whose posts leave you feeling worse about your body? Whose leave you feeling the same or better?
When you compare yourself, who do you pick? How often is it someone whose photos are posed, filtered, or professionally lit?
What would your feed look like if a third of it showed bodies like yours doing ordinary things?

How You Care for Your Body Now

Think about the last time you exercised, ate a meal, or got dressed. Did it come more from care or from punishment? How can you tell the difference while it is happening?
What do you avoid because of how you feel about your body? Swimming, photos, dancing, intimacy, a checkup?
When your body is tired, sick, or in pain, what do you say to it? Would you say the same thing to a friend?

One Kind Experiment for This Week

Pick one of these and try it for seven days. Afterward, notice what changed, even a little.

A nightly thank-you: Before bed, write down one thing your body did that day. Keep it ordinary: walked the dog, digested lunch, hugged your kid.

One avoided thing: Do one small thing you have been skipping because of your body, such as wearing shorts on a hot day or stepping into a group photo. Notice what actually happens.

A feed reset: Mute three accounts that leave you comparing, and follow three that show a wider range of bodies, ages, and abilities. Check your mood at the end of the week.

When to Reach for More Support

Sometimes body image struggles go further than everyday dislike. Talk with a doctor, a counselor, or an eating disorder specialist if any of these sound familiar: skipping meals or restricting food to change your shape, making yourself sick, using laxatives or extra exercise to make up for eating, eating in a way that feels out of control, or spending hours checking, fixing, or hiding a part of your appearance that other people barely notice.
Nothing on that list means you have failed. Specialists hear about these concerns every day, and you do not need to wait until things get worse to ask.
If you are in crisis in the US, call or text 988, or call your local emergency number.

References

Alleva, J. M., Martijn, C., Van Breukelen, G. J. P., Jansen, A., & Karos, K. (2015). Expand your horizon: A programme that improves body image and reduces self-objectification by training women to focus on body functionality. Body Image, 15, 81-89. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.bodyim.2015.07.001
Fardouly, J., Diedrichs, P. C., Vartanian, L. R., & Halliwell, E. (2015). Social comparisons on social media: The impact of facebook on young women's body image concerns and mood. Body Image, 13, 38-45. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.bodyim.2014.12.002
Tylka, T. L., & Wood-Barcalow, N. L. (2015). What is and what is not positive body image? Conceptual foundations and construct definition. Body Image, 14, 118-129. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.bodyim.2015.04.001

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